Overcoming trauma with Auntie Angel, famed fellatio coach. Image 1.

Whitney Kimball

Author

Overcoming trauma with Auntie Angel, famed fellatio coach. Image 2.

Andrey Smirny

Illustrator

   

Probably NSFW: See Auntie Angel's blowjob technique tips at the bottom of this article.

If the word "grapefruiting" is permanently engraved in your sexual vocabulary, it's thanks to Angel Walker, fellatio coach Auntie Angel. By now, at least 1.6 million people have watched the YouTube video demonstrating her oral technique involving a grapefruit with a hole in the middle of it. 

The technique supposedly makes your blowée feel like he's getting head and having sex at the same time, but I suspect that the video's popularity doesn't hinge on ingenuity alone. Citrus and sex are enticingly dicey, for starters. But mostly Angel herself is captivating: she goes at it with a firm nuts-and-bolts grip of the shaft and walks us through the steps of preparing the fruit before proceeding to make a sucking noise which, combined with the recording equipment, sounds like a furious wildcat (it's intentional). She approaches her task with total control, walking us through the steps like "do not microwave it; do not boil it; he must be blindfolded" with the composure and control of a gun safety expert. She makes giving head look empowering. 

And after a conversation, Angel convinced me that it can beA former US army employee-turned-full-time-fellatio instructor, and survivor of sexual abuse, Angel teaches a kind of blow job where women (and their jaw muscles, and even taste buds) come first. Her techniques are freaky, freaky in a way that turns freakiness into power.

 

(NSFW) Auntie Angel's

Grapefruit technique

 

 1,082,353 views at time of publication

 

 

 

HOPES&FEARS: Your website mentions that you were in the military before starting intimacy coaching. How did you end up teaching fellatio?

AUNTIE ANGEL: Well, my dad died when I was younger, right after my freshman year of high school, and then I went to go live with a brother. I had been raped when I was nine, and my mother was mentally ill growing up. Then, when I went to go live with my brother, I was raped again by another family member.

H&F: Oh, God.

AUNTIE ANGEL: My life was just crazy. Eventually, I just didn't know where to go. My mother was committed, my dad was dead. After my freshman year of college, I decided to join the military for structure, discipline, and really, a roof over my head.

H&F: What were you doing in the military?

AUNTIE ANGEL: I didn’t do the regular army, I did Weekend Warrior for eight years– but I actually was a mechanic, fixing old cars.

I even taught sex education in the military, which is funny because that wasn't something I’d ever thought about getting into. It’s just that I've always been a sexual person, and I've always studied anatomy and the body.

I’ve also always been a safe sex lady, so I would teach men or women to put a condom on their feet, because a lot of men say, “Oh it's too tight, I can't fit it.” If a man's penis is bigger than your foot, then, yes, he shouldn't be able to use a condom. Other than that, safe sex.

H&F: Why did you decide to leave the military?

AUNTIE ANGEL: Well, I got married, and it just wasn't feasible for me to travel. I just wanted to stay grounded. Then, my mom and I reconnected, and I didn't want to leave her– even though she was schizophrenic, she’d started to do much better. My dad wasn’t around so I longed to have a relationship with a parent. 

So when I came home from the military, I just didn't understand why I had such a horrible life, and I just prayed... and I realized that we go through hell to bless other people.

We all go through something, but there's a lesson in it. And when you come out, you help other people. With my classes, I'm able to talk to women about being raped and how to forgive and move on. I realized how a lot of women will stay stuck in that moment, and they're not sexually active because they have fear and guilt, and they take that into their relationships. Even though I teach fellatio, I teach so much more, and I realize that I had to go through those things to teach other women.

H&F: How did you start getting over that with your own sex partners?

AUNTIE ANGEL: Really, it was forgiveness. It’s one of the most important things we can ever possess because no one can take it or give it to us. Forgiveness is very hard to give because you can forgive someone, but you don't forget. I had to forgive the people who raped me. I had to forgive my family members for not being there for me. I had to forgive my mother for being mentally ill. Once I released that, I realized that I was a sexual being.

I knew that I enjoyed sex, and I was able to explore it. After a while, I just start opening up my mind to other things. I'm like, Well if I do this, is that too freaky? Then I was like, I'm a freak! It is what it is. I'm going to hold on to it, and I don't let my past dictate my future. I control my destiny.

H&F: When did you decide to become an intimacy expert?

AUNTIE ANGEL: I started twelve years ago after I had my second son. After I had my first child, I was very beautiful. I glowed. My breasts were all nice because I was breastfeeding, my stomach went down, and I started doing some online modeling. This guy said, “Every time I take pictures of you, you have this glow about you.” He named me Angel.

I basically started the company because I was one of those ladies that would talk. And women would ask, Tell me about what gets you excited, how did you do this, how did you do that?

A lot of women say you shouldn't talk about what you're doing in the bedroom, but I just never had that fear. We were doing some things that I had never heard of, and I wanted everyone else to be freaky too. My girlfriends were just like, Oh my God! Can you show me? I realized that men and women are both visual. I just got some of my girlfriends together and I showed them exactly what it was that I was doing. They start going home and doing it on their guys, and women would tell me, I just got engaged! or I just got a new car or He bought me a house! They start telling their friends and so on. Twelve years later, this is where I'm at, so it really, really works.

 

 

H&F: You have all these great terms...There’s one video on YouTube where your manager, Jay, is shouting out all the techniques, and you’re performing them on a dildo rapid fire. There's “The Double 8,” “Fire and Ice,” “The Love Bite” etc. Where did the names come from?

AUNTIE ANGEL: I came up with the names because it just helped to remember exactly what it's all about. It's fun practicing, and even if you mess up, he's so excited you're down there doing something extra and different.

I’m going to push my DVDs because they're so different. The techniques need to be done in a certain order, I wouldn't recommend someone just jumping into one [advanced] technique because you're not going to get the best result. I formulated these blow jobs for her mouth first, and then for his enjoyment second. If you do it while you’re watching the videos, he’ll tell you what he likes and doesn't like because that will customize it, it's all about him. It's all about communication because everything is different for men. What's good for him is not good for Bob, so you want to make sure you customize your head for your man.

It's not really about you, anymore. He might not like that sound effect. He might not like that wetness, he might not even like that technique. Now, women, we're all in our head. We always overthink everything: does he like the way it sounds, smells, tastes? Can the kids hear? We don't enjoy sex as much as men because a lot of times, men don't care. Now, you have a template of what you should do, and then you have him critique exactly what he wants you to do. Pretty much, it's a no-brainer.

H&F: What are some typical hang-ups for women?

AUNTIE ANGEL: A lot of women do not like a lot of saliva because you were raised as a lady, and ladies don't spit. I tell women, "You have to learn how to get your ho up.” A little ho can go a long way because when you're out of your own mindset, you just put all that nasty stuff on your alter ego. It frees you up to be a little freakier.

That's when the sound effect [that I make in my demonstrations] comes up– that's just a fake sound. The average woman will make their oohs and aahs, but that's every woman that's he's ever been with, all his life. The way I've always looked at it is, I want to be a lot better than the last chick, and I'm pretty sure every woman does too. Women are always in some type of competition, it's just our makeup. He's never heard that [sound] before, so he's looking at you like, what the heck is going on?

If he doesn't like it, I tell women, you can always change it. You can go down a notch. But don't start at zero to ten– start at ten and work your way down.

H&F: Obviously, the grapefruit video is a smash hit. Are there any other household things that you can use to practice techniques?

AUNTIE ANGEL: I actually have a new technique with a cucumber, whipped cream and honey.

It's more of a jacking-off technique for him than a fellatio technique. Sometimes women do not want to give head; you're tired, you've got a headache, the kids are working your nerves, or whatever it is. But some women will still want to please him if he's in the mood, so we normally probably will give him a hand job. So I came up with the cucumber, which is basically just cutting the ends off, slicing the side of the cucumber lengthwise, and scooping the insides out. The longer the cucumber is, the better, even if he's not really long.

That way, the cucumber can open up. Because if you're man is girthy, of course he's not going to be able to slide his penis in that small hole. Then, warm it up for thirty seconds to a minute in a microwave. Because cucumbers will get cool really quick. Then all you're going to do is slide his penis right in that cucumber, and just jack it off. Because it's long, it's going to go over the head, the shaft. And it’s a great vegetable for swelling, it’s not acidic, and it's not going to affect his skin or the urethra or anything like that. And if you've ever put your finger inside of a cucumber, just imagine if you had a penis, it would just ... It's an amazing feeling. He's happy, you're happy and you spent fifty cents. Yeah, so that is my newest technique. I just think outside the box. 

Sex gets to be so boring after a while. I just wanted to think of things that people could probably just have in their home, to make it sexy, but also safe. Know if a person is allergic to something.

H&F: Back to trauma... Is that something that you get often in your classes?

AUNTIE ANGEL: At the end of the class, I open it up; the first part is the fellatio, then I teach the grapefruit, then there's questions and answers. Then, I go into fantasies and all that, and at the very end, I tell women my story. I want them to know who this person is in front of them because everyone has a story. I also talk about this at the beginning of my book, Angel’s Secrets. When I go into it, the faces of the ladies completely change because at first we're all laughing and giggling, we're giving head and saliva's everywhere. The mood changes because they want to empathize with my story, but a lot of them can relate. I do that because I need to open up a platform for women, more than just sex.

A lot of women come there to learn more things, but they're not going to go home and really do everything because they still have this cloud over their heads. Ninety percent of women have either been raped, molested, or have some type of sexual harassment. What do you do with that? You're having sex, but these negative things are happening to you, a lot of women won't be as sexually open or some women don't want to have sex at all. A lot of women may want to be with another woman. There's just so many different things that can happen. You have children, you're scared for your kids to go anywhere because you're scared someone's going to do it to them.

When I talk to women about it, you can see the tears on their face because they can relate, and some women even walk out because I hit a nerve. But then they come back, and then they come push me to the side and say, “You don't realize how much you helped me with your story.” Because the key to it all is about empowering women, it's all about us, helping each other to get better. We all have common denominators– doesn't matter if you're black, white, rich, poor, older, or younger. We all have a vagina, we all have a penis, or we want penis, we all have feelings. We all have children or something in common. We need to really help each other, we need to empower one another. I teach that in every class.

 

 

Overcoming trauma with Auntie Angel, famed fellatio coach. Image 3.

 

auntie angel's BLOW JOB TECHNIQUE

Mouth-watering
Good

The sole purpose of the technique is to get your mouth extremely wet because the wetter, the better. All you're going to do is take his penis and push it as far back into your throat until you gag. When you gag, your mouth waters, and your eyes tear. A lot of women say, Oh, Auntie Angel, I don't want to throw up! I always tell women, it's all about your hand placement, as well– you use your hand around the shaft of his penis to use your mouth as a marker.

Once you gag a couple of times just to bring up fluid, you slide your hand up, maybe like an inch higher– you hold it there and then you just do a basic BJ. I tell women all the time, ‘always control the dick, you never let the dick control you.’ 

With that technique, it just helps your mouth to get really wet because just like with sex, men like wetter vagina. 

 

Overcoming trauma with Auntie Angel, famed fellatio coach. Image 4.

auntie angel's BLOW JOB TECHNIQUE

Fire and 
Ice

It's really nasty and ho-ish, but it's super sexy and freaky at the same time. “Fire and Ice” is basically using your breath going down the shaft of his penis; your mouth is open, the heat from your breath is fire, and as you blow out, down, all that saliva built up in your mouth is going to shoot out on the shaft of his penis and on his pelvis. Then you're going to suck it up, and it cools the saliva off, which is ice. 

You’re also going to close your mouth and incorporate your teeth on the upstroke. When you’re at the bottom, grab the shaft of his penis with your teeth, close your mouth, and suck up, using your lips as a buffer. It's like you want to suck up all that semen out of him. Even if he doesn't have an orgasm at that time, you're still going to recycle some of that saliva you spat down on him. Now you give him hot, cold, you give him texture with your teeth and you give him the visual of the saliva everywhere.

And even though you’re using your mouth, coming up with the teeth on the upstroke isn’t that much work. You can still use your hand for placement, so you won't go down too far when you're doing the fire.

 

Overcoming trauma with Auntie Angel, famed fellatio coach. Image 5.

auntie angel's BLOW JOB TECHNIQUE

The 
Lollipop
Lick

This technique incorporates the three most important components of a blowjob: the testicles, the shaft and the head.

Start at the base of the penis, right by the testicles, and then pull his penis back a little, closer to his abdomen. When you're down between his legs, you lick up the testicles, the shaft, up to the head, with your taste buds. When you get to the top of the head of his penis, you're going to suck; on your way back down, you flip your tongue and use the slippery softness on the underbelly and slide down the shaft, down to the balls, and then you just repeat going back up. Going up, he feels the soft roughness of your taste buds and the slippery wetness of the underside. 

The thing I love about that technique is that it's not an invasive technique, meaning, she's not working her mouth to death. The only time she's sucking is when she comes to the top. Everything else is visual, still feels good, she still feels in control, and he's in ecstasy. 

 

Overcoming trauma with Auntie Angel, famed fellatio coach. Image 6.